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| How a band 9 in IELTS changes your life |
When I was studying architecture at university, English was my burden. I did not understand that English was important in my life. I knew that I got a good enough score to pass the exam. I realized that English is an excellent tool for me to have more opportunities for a job after I have graduated; I have put my study into consideration until now. I wish I had achieved a higher IELTS band score. My life would change. Nowadays, many young people get a high IELTS band score because they early realize the importance of a foreign language, which helps them access the knowledge and have many opportunities. If I achieved a band score of 9 in IELTS, I would do many things that I have never done before.
Firstly, I am keen on learning new things and knowledge in a new culture. If I achieved IELTS band 9, I would study abroad. Band 9 in IELTS is the maximum score, which measures your language proficiency. Having IELTS band nine is like saying that I would be an English native speaker. IELTS would help me approach education, culture, economy, and society in the country I will live in.
Secondly, IELTS is the best tool in many aspects of my work. If I succeed, I will change my job because my current job is quite dull. I am sitting in front of the computer and working. I do not have the opportunity to get a new social relationship. The main reason I am learning English is to take advantage of my knowledge for my work. I want to work in the sales or marketing department. Having the highest IELTS band score is my bright point for the employer. I would easily apply for a good position, an open environment for me to work with. I would have more change in my career.
Thirdly, if I got a band score of 9 in IELTS, I would help people struggling to learn English. I would support and give a lot of my experiences to them. Moreover, I know many barriers to studying English. Furthermore, I would teach English to my children, which I’ve never received before because my parents didn’t help me to learn English at that time. That’s why I want to teach my children English. I would establish the best communication environment for my child, who would be the best version of me.
In conclusion, achieving a band score of 9 in IELTS is a dream of many people. If I reached it, my life would turn in a different direction.
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Feedback on the IELTS essay:
To be able to use a wide range of vocabulary, we need to use synonyms by using this website:
Don’t repeat good,good,good,good…. Not all synonyms fit a certain topic.
LR:
“to grab many things” meaning is not clear. So, instead, explain what those things are -- paraphrasing. to have more opportunities for a job...
“plunging into” doesn’t fit the sentence.
We don’t have an IELTS degree, but we have an IELTS band score
“Access” what? How do we use that word → word choice
How do we write?
Step 1: What’s the idea? Main topic? Supporting sentences? Reasons? Details?
Step 2: make a mind-mapping, write, and don’t care about your mistakes.
Step 3: edit your writing concerning grammar.
Step 4: edit your essay for vocabulary until you have the best piece of writing.
- Use the present perfect if we want to relate the past to the current time.